I am also 44 years old. Was overweight and the 'dumpy-depressed housewife" until I got divorced over 6 years ago, lost weight and immediately joined a gym. I go faithfully, usually 4 to 5 times a week, and I toned up, especially my arms. This year I met the most wonderful handsome man, and I am in love. :) But a month ago my arms started showing major signs of sun damaged skin...the wrinkles started and then where my arms were so tone, the start of sagging...I've cried and cried. I worked so hard for this and I'm so devastated....this boyfriend is wonderful...he doesn't know I'm so worried...I don't think he's noticed, as I 'hide" my skin right now. I was always the ugly duckling.....then my life changed for the positive, and now to have this, and wonder if it's going to keep going at this accelerated rate...I'm a mess.

This is my first opportunity to join the Older Women Forum on the topic of aging and I was delighted to find your posting. I am 53 years old and just at the beginning of menopause. I have decided to journal my way through this transitional stage of life and feel very strongly that it will be a positive experience. I agree whole heartedly with your three-stage overview of the female life cycle and as I age feel myself becoming increasingly more wise, more Crone like. The process of aging is reality. It is when we struggle against the reality of aging and delude ourselves that we suffer in what can easily be a wonderfully rich time of life. It isn't our work to convience society that aging women are to be embraced, we simply need to embrace it ourselves. Others are watching, our friends, our families, younger women. Let them decide for themselves what it is to age. Let us be an positive example!

I have never felt more beautiful than I did on my 70th birthday! I am healthy and happy and comfortable in my own skin. Thank you Dove, for helping others to age joyfully. Cheers, Joan

Ok please show your open mindedness for beauty as well as this post, for the main fact it deals with religion.

Okay the Pagans believe that there are 3 stages in each woman and man's life, regardless of gender: Maiden (infant to puberty), Mother (adult and parent) and Crone (aging elder).

But the point of this is they are all looked up to, essentially for the wisdom each holds. The Maiden holds the innocence, the hope for the future, the Mother for her nurturing and knowledge obtained, and the Crone for her wisdom of lives seen and lived. In reality it is the Crone that is most prized and looked up to by the whole community. They essentially hold the universe in their arms.

No Crone is not a negative word, not whatso ever. Even if you are not of pagan religion the idea of these stages in your life does not break any taboos. Basically i'm trying to explain that there is beauty in all stages in your life, just let it glow through.

^_^
Blessed Be All
And Harm To None

I have always been made fun of throughout my life for being either a tomboy, or after i had surgery, too fat. See my surgery just took out my tonsils and adniods, but from then on i could actually taste the food i was eating. That was in elementary school, i am now almost 19 years old and still constantly on the battle of the bulge. Now more than ever its been a point, i don't have the money to buy new jeans, new clothes that fit my figure. I just wear my work uniform and the few pants i have left. I find myself beautiful in my own ways, just not healthy. I want to lose weight for health reasons and then further down the line before i start to plan for children, quit smoking. These adds that have been coming out from Dove are so moving to me, ever since my mum called me over for the commercial where one of the people (i avoid using the word models) had a mowhak. lol, i used to have one. I am so glad they have come forward with the campaign, something real to look forward to for my children someday.

When i think of beauty i think of and old Gypsy mother with a smile, hug, stories, love, and a big plate of home cooked food. The last part my be my downfall lol. Who cares, I'll treat my children the same way.

When I was young I was often told by complete strangers that I was beautiful. I had little trouble attacting men. Now I am 51 and when I look in the mirror I love what I see now more than what I saw 30 years ago. Why. because I am beautiful inside, and that is what really counts. I can't wait until I get old enough to be crabby and get away with it.

I am 46 years old and this past week I received a wonderful complement from a young man in his late 20's. He has no idea wonderful wonderful he made me feel. He told me I was a twenty-five year old trapped in a 45 year old body and that I was a beautiful person. What a lovely thing for him to say! I was at my niece's wedding, dancing up a storm and having a wonderful good time celebrating life at its best. My joy of living made me beautiful from within and it showed.

I am so young at heart I forget I don't look 30 something anymore. I smile a lot and crinkles at my eyes show it. I rarely wear makeup and dress for comfort more than fashion - I always have. I imagine I will be wearing my jeans when I'm 90+!

I am totally enthralled with the DOVE beauty from within campaign. I have used the program, videos and film clips to educate all my guide I DO NOT believe in dieting but I do believe in eating with awareness so if I eat rich food on vacation, I will eat more fruit and veggies when I am at home.

I wish there were more films for us - like Calendar Girls, on Golden Pond, Bridges in Madision county. They are inspiring. I wish I could imbue confidence in all the women around me to just NOT buy into the false image of beauty.

Thanks DOVE for leading the way

Getting old. Yes it worries me. The laugh lines are more prominent, the face more worn, your skin not as supple, but being older gves you a poise and confidence you cannot begin to emulate when you are young. I like to think I set an example for my girls on how to handle the whole ageng thing. Do the best you can with what you have and put yourself out there- don't be afraid of showing your personality in whatever you do and be at peace with yourself. Others will appreciate you so much more for being honest.

Hi;
My name is Serina and I have to tell you that you can treat yourself and reward yourself with so many things other than food. You absolutely, positively have to give up food as a source of comfort. I know you can do it because if I did it , and if I did it, anyone can and that includes you. You can live on one small meal a day. Most of the people on this planet do and after only two weeks, you don’t even miss it any more. No kidding. Buy yourself some pretty if inexpensive jewelry to reward yourself for staying on diet. Have your nails done really pretty. That will boost your self-esteem and it’s cheap and easy to add to your shower routine. It was my mom (I still can't believe it) that turned me on to this way cool face treatment. Even though I'm only thirty-six, I have done a lot of outdoor sports since sixth grade, even when I was fat. The sun damage to my face was out of control. The joke amongst my friends was that only guys over-fifty would hit on me. Well that was last year. Now I look way better and am getting really cool guys in my own age group for “having fun” partners. For me It was the wrinkles more than the fat, but it is all cumulative. Isn’t it? When your face starts looking better and younger, that will give you a real emotional boost. Pretty soon the good stuff starts to be cumulative, just like the bad stuff did. And that’s just what I can think of offhand. There are plenty of ways to feel better about yourself that don’t cost you a bunch of time and money. If I had to exercise off my extra fat, I would still be sixty-five pounds heaver. It is so much easier to quit food as a source of comfort. I’m pretty sure I trashed all my fat pictures after I got myself under control, but I’ll look around and sent you one if I still have any. I went from a size 10-12 to a size 4 and you can do it also.
Blessings;
Serina. Johnston

quote:

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Originally posted by: yvette
I remember in Junior High School I weighed 180 lbs and I was called a beachball. In 10th grade I started dieting and weight lifting. I dropped to 110 lbs. But guess what? I was miserable. No one cared who I was but I didnt care, I was thin. Now, after one child, quitting smoking after 22 years, being in my first marriage of 20 years, and jaw surgery, I am back to 180. I am fighting depression over this every day. I will not even undress in front of my husband now. Its very scary that what happens to you earlier in life stays with you forever. I refuse to get my picture taken and will not go anywhere in shorts.
I dont like what I have become and would give anything to change it. Dont let this happen to the next generation

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I remember in Junior High School I weighed 180 lbs and I was called a beachball. In 10th grade I started dieting and weight lifting. I dropped to 110 lbs. But guess what? I was miserable. No one cared who I was but I didnt care, I was thin. Now, after one child, quitting smoking after 22 years, being in my first marriage of 20 years, and jaw surgery, I am back to 180. I am fighting depression over this every day. I will not even undress in front of my husband now. Its very scary that what happens to you earlier in life stays with you forever. I refuse to get my picture taken and will not go anywhere in shorts.
I dont like what I have become and would give anything to change it. Dont let this happen to the next generation

Real beauty is not a number, which people relate too 20,25,, 40, 50. If you can just imagine taking a birthday away and not having a number. Real beauty comes with any number. It is how you feel inside and how you look at life from the outside. Its not how old you are. I feel I was pretty at 25, but what Dove products have done for me is made me beautiful at 51. The word beautiful has an experience and knowledge mark with it. As we live our lifes we gain all that experience and knowledge. Pretty does not even come close too beautiful.

I welcome the opportunity to add to the position that the depth of woman's beauty increases as the years add to her experience, wisdom and visual presense. This depth builds a strong foundation on which women can look within themselves, to each other and out to the world.
It is a lofty goal to walk each day conscious of both love and beauty available and within us.
Thank you Dove.....My link to this consciousness each morning is to see the beautiful bird that is symbolic in your white soap and shampoo. When I shower or bathe, I carry the symbol of the Dove in my hands as I sweep purity and peace over my body. As I do this, I burn a white dove candle to bring light to each day. This is my private celebration of who I am. I don't know if the original author of the name of this soap realized the power of this symbol, but I invite every woman to keep peace with themselves and shine this out to others in acceptance, love and unity with all.

You are absolutly right! I am 55 and I feel like the invisible woman. I am striking a blow for women of all ages though, I am not coloring my hair anymore, I do wear a little makeup to make me feel better and as long as I exercise, eat right and keep smiling, I think the rest of the world will catch on, if not, oh well.

Change in attitude will come from within ourselves and be reflected out.

I think you might be on to something. My mother is 83 and she still looks fantastic. She swears by Dove and has never smoked, drank or used any makeup in her life. I hope that I luck out as much as her.

I will be 44 this year, and I feel like I'm invisible. Even though I think I'm more attractive now than I was 10 years ago, because I'm not dewy-skinned or pert-figured, I have somehow become a ghost. It feels like the greatest flight of fancy to even dare imagine finding a partner now, because men have bought into this ideal of beauty just as surely as women have. I wish, rather than believe, that this will soon change to include women of all ages, but the older I get the less likely it seems.

Of course I want to be loved and valued for who I am, and I don't wear make-up or make a big fuss over what I'm wearing. I don't say these things out loud either, because it's not as though it's a reason for pride, it just is what it is. Like all people, I want to be considered attractive just as I am - but it's a pipe dream, a set of terms no one seems capable of accepting.

Our present society can accept the unconventional only up to a point, and beyond that point is the upper shelf, where you must remain, gathering dust, until you die. It makes me angry and heartbroken at the same time, because it isn't right - I know I'm still vital...why can't anyone else see it?

I saying I made up, that peaople should know...
'sexy' means: Confident, fearless, proud, happy, daring, willing to be themselves, unique, not afraid to speak up, into flaunting it.

My name is Johanna Louie and I am currently a student in Ontario, Canada. I am in the process of gathering information on body image for my school newspaper. My article is about how celebrity images are being manipulated (photoshopped) to create a perfect image and how they influence the youth of today. My article involves how it may cause a distorted view of beauty and how it affects the way young teens look at themselves.


I would appreciate it if I got a few of your opinions on this topic.

These flawless celebrity photographs are so perfect the celebrity themself look fake and almost god-like. Photomanipulation is so advanced that they can change the size of your waist, remove blemishes and even change the clothing you are wearing. They can even remove wrinkles! (ex: www.fluideffect.com)

If you were to be 'photoshopped' in real life, what would you want fixed? Do magazine and ad images have an influence your previous answer?

How do you feel knowing that the images in magazines and ads are being manipulated to create a perfect image of beauty? How do you feel knowing that older celebrities may not be as flawless as they look on photographs?

Thank you for you time ladies!



*Should my article be published in my school paper, would any of you mind if I used your quote and name? If you prefer to be quoted as your username, please let me know.*

If anyone should like to see TV time for older beautiful women, please look into a movie called Calender Girls, it's one of my favorite movies of female empowerment doing something daring to go against all society's standards for a greater good......as quoted in vague resemblance to one line in the movie "life is like a flower, it goes through it's stages from a seedling to a strong sturdy plant giving life to those around it, but it is the last stage that is the most beautiful and glorious, when the flower blooms and gives the world it's light and beauty"

there all beautiful in there own way;-)